i love rainy days, for they bring with them a sense of peace and calmness that i can't find anywhere else. the pitter-patter of raindrops on the roof, like tiny musicians playing their symphony, fills my heart with joy. it's not just the sound, but the smell too – the earthy aroma that follows after a rainfall, like nature's own perfume. it's a feeling, more than anything, that i can't quite explain in words, but it feels... cozy.
once, when i was little, i remember stepping out into the rain without an umbrella. my mother scolded me, saying i'd catch a cold, but i didn't care. there was something exhilarating about being drenched, feeling the cool drops slide down my face, making me feel alive. i remember laughing, twirling around in the puddles, and for a moment, all my worries seemed to wash away with the rain. that was the day i learned that sometimes, getting wet is better than staying dry.
however, there's also a melancholic side to rainy days. they remind me of lost friends, of times we shared under the same roof, watching the rain together. rain can be a friend, a companion in solitude, but it can also be a reminder of what's missing. the raindrops seem to whisper stories of the past, and sometimes those whispers turn into echoes that linger in my mind.
in school, our english teacher taught us how rain is a metaphor for life – it can be gentle or fierce, it can nourish or devastate, just like our experiences. but she never said how it could be both at once, how it could make you smile and cry within the same moment. i guess that's the magic of rainy days, their ability to evoke a spectrum of emotions.
the other day, i wrote a poem about rainy days, but it didn't turn out well. the words felt forced, the rhymes awkward. i realized then that poetry, like rain, isn't something you can capture; it has to come naturally, from the heart. so, i tore the pages and let the rain wash over them, letting go of my attempt to control the beauty of the moment.
rainy days are like life's little surprises, unpredictable and full of surprises. you can plan your day, but you can't predict when the rain will pour. and that's okay, because sometimes, the unexpected can be the most beautiful part.
老師評(píng)語(yǔ)：
the essay showcases a personal connection with rainy days, demonstrating a childlike wonder and a deeper, reflective sentiment. however, the transition from childhood memories to the metaphorical aspect of rain could be smoother. also, the mention of the failed poem could benefit from more elaboration.
內(nèi)容亮點(diǎn)：
the narrative effectively captures the emotional nuances of rainy days, blending nostalgia, joy, and melancholy. the imagery of rain as a metaphor for life adds depth.
優(yōu)化參考：
the paragraph discussing the poem could be restructured to flow more seamlessly from the preceding reflection. instead of abruptly mentioning the poem, it could be woven into the narrative, describing how the rain inspired an attempt at poetry.
批改后作文
rainy days have always been my companions, their melodies harmonizing with my emotions. one such day, i found myself scribbling a poem, hoping to encapsulate the essence of rain. the words, however, felt stilted, like raindrops frozen mid-air. i realized then that poetry, much like the rain, cannot be captured; it must be felt, allowed to fall freely from the heart.
作文寫作素材：
閱讀參考
for a deeper understanding of rain as a literary device, explore "the love song of j. alfred prufrock" by t.s. eliot and "the rime of the ancient mariner" by samuel taylor coleridge. also, consider studying the works of william wordsworth, who often used nature, including rain, to explore human emotions in his poetry.
相關(guān)詩(shī)句
1. 水色碧滄茫，山勢(shì)青周遭。壯哉杳渺峰，據(jù)此第一高。蕭梁古道場(chǎng)，歲月湮蓬蒿。有來(lái)天師孫，遠(yuǎn)與朱葉曹。十年悉力營(yíng)，萬(wàn)瓦一手操。連甍集紫煙，開(kāi)窗俯洪濤。枸杞號(hào)千年，夜鶴鳴九皋。坐令金丹爐，安此神火熬。英英文章伯，所至禿千毫。何此
2. 白蘋有嘉招，蒼弁得勝踐。會(huì)心不憚遠(yuǎn)，乘興恐失便?；@輿犯窮臘，共作忍寒面。溟蒙云釀雪，浩蕩風(fēng)落雁。松篁漸清幽，猿鶴或悲怨。英英文章公，作舍鎖蔥蒨。峰俯前榮嶢，佳木秀諸院。窮搜發(fā)山骨，林立侍談讌。西巖踞熊虎，東巖峙屏案。履綦
3. 李侯佳句似陰鏗，早向茶山識(shí)贛曾。滌器寧同長(zhǎng)卿逸，閉門不學(xué)玉川憎。平居尚憶尋君去，南廟應(yīng)還訪我能。詩(shī)卷當(dāng)時(shí)更誰(shuí)與，玄英文采被云仍。
